‘Us parents need to up our game’: What’s next after Adolescence?

Harrowing Netflix series Adolescence has shone a terrifying light on the dangers facing young people today.

It’s become a wake-up call for parents, often unaware of the misogynistic and rage-fuelled dangers their children are being exposed to online.

The four-part programme, which holds a 98% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, has been viewed more than 24,300,000 times in just one week.

Shot in one take in each episode, Adolescence stars Line of Duty’s Stephen Graham and Owen Cooper in his debut onscreen role as Jamie Miller, a 13-year-old boy accused of the murder of a girl in his class.

We quickly discover he did do it, but the question then remains of why.

In its exploration of the radicalisation of young boys on the internet, viewers see the impact the murder had on Jamie’s schoolmates, his own family coming to the realisation they weren’t aware of this side of him, and Owen’s incredible acting switching his behaviour in front of a psychologist (played by Erin Doherty).

Though fictional, the series has been inspired by real-life knife attacks and the horrific acts of violence against women hitting headlines, and teenagers have since spoken out about how little adults ‘understand’ what they’re facing.

Since its launch, parents across the world have been questioning if they need to be doing more to protect their kids from the dangers of extreme misogynistic ideologies like incel culture and the ones spouted by the likes of Andrew Tate.

Commenting on a recent Metro post, hundreds of parents have shared what they’ve learnt from Adolescence, with one called Abi saying: ‘I finished it last night (in a puddle of tears!) – absolutely incredible. The acting was amazing and the way it was filmed was so immersive. Terrifying as the mum of a tween but crucial viewing.’

Sharon added that the ‘harrowing and haunting’ series will have ‘shaken many parents across the land and that has to be a good thing’.

Lucy echoed several others in saying the Netflix show needs to be played in schools.

She wrote: ‘Every school in last year of juniors through to secondary should play this out to the kids, and I think for the sake of our beautiful children phones with out internet till they are at least 16 , computers out of bedrooms, and set up in living rooms so parents can parent, don’t want our kids quiet and shut in bedrooms [poisoning] their brains, talk to them, encourage them talk , because we are forgetting how to!!’

Peter also said: ‘As a parent of a teenage child this was tough watch. So well made, we watched all episodes back to back; it kept me awake after as I was asking ‘are WE doing enough?’ when it comes to her up bringing. This should be shown in high schools perhaps to highlight the impact of knife crime…’

Iulia said the responsibility lies with the parents, writing: ‘I think that what we need to take from this is that we are too tolerant towards our kids and we need to close the neat a little bit. Let the responsibility be on us and not to the school, society, other parents etc…we are responsible for what we raise.

‘We are responsible to give them a good education and impose some restrictions. They need to know what boundaries are. Children work very well if they have limitations…if they have everything because that is what we offer them they don’t know where to stop.’

She did however argue that it wasn’t about ‘knowing what the emojis are’, adding: ‘It is about the facts. Let start thinking like our parents. They’ve done a pretty good job raising us.’

Adolescence has pointed out how unaware some parents are of the language young people are using online, including emojis coded as sinister messages.

In one scene, Ashley Walters’ character DI Luke Bascombe is schooled by his son on what the ‘red pill’ emoji means, after misinterpreting it to be friendly, even flirtatious.

‘The red pill is like “I see the truth”. It’s a call to action by the manosphere,’ his onscreen son Adam (played by Amari Bacchus) says in the second episode.

‘She’s saying he’s an incel, dad. She’s saying he always will be. That’s why they say you’re an incel, they’re saying you’re going to be a virgin forever.’

He explains that a dynamite emoji represents ‘an exploding red pill’, meaning that someone is an incel, before saying the kidney bean emoji can also be used to self-identify as an incel.

Some Metro readers have admitted they had ‘no clue’ about such things – reflected by the rise in Google queries of ‘the meaning of incel’ – with Jason writing: ‘I’m 31 and assumed I knew about these sort of things. But wow I had no clue. Proves us parents need to up our games and educate ourselves more on the current trends and meanings of things.’

His comments echo digital safety development officer Laura Simpson, who said parents should not ‘bury their heads in the sand’ about the safety of their children.

She told the BBC: ‘I think my key takeaway from the series was a moment in the last episode when the parents looked at each other and asked: “Should we have done more?”

‘That acknowledgement that they were not involved enough in aspects of their son’s life which had ultimately led to tragedy should be a wake-up call to everyone who is a parent, carer or professional who works with kids of any age.’

She added to the BBC that her advice to parents would be to talk to their children about their online lives and use parental controls on the internet.

Metro reader Natalie added: ‘So many different issues that this has dealt with but I think we as parents need to take better responsibility for our children. 13 year olds out at 10pm at night while they should be in bed and allowed a phone and T.V in their room, where they can stay up till all hours watching whatever they wish.

‘When a child or teenager is told to go to bed it should be to sleep at that appropriate time so that they can get up in the morning and have enough energy to concentrate at School

‘Not all but a lot of parents are failing their children by giving them to much freedom to do as they wish and far too much access to social media!’

Danny Dyer has been among celebrities who are parents also speaking out, with the EastEnders actor and dad-of-three saying: ‘I think this is something we need to tap into, and I think this has maybe done it.

‘We need to find out what’s going on with our young boys, and weirdly, television is the platform, because it ain’t going to be politicians, let’s have it right.’

Father of two sons Jeff Brazier has also shared he’s ‘grateful’ to the Netflix series for ‘highlighting what we all struggle with as parents’.

‘How much is too much for me to be able to storm into the room and say, “I think you’re having a dangerous conversation. I need to look at your phone” – the fallouts,’ he said, according to The Mirror.

‘In the end, we try to avoid that because we want a peaceful, calm and happy home but they’re in their bedrooms and their in their phones. Everything’s calm but it might not be.

‘I’ve had nightmares as much as the next parent, to be honest.’

In an exclusive interview with Metro, rising star Owen also shared his hopes from the show.

‘I hope that to the parents it’ll open an eye to them, definitely. Kids’ social media is them. It’s their personal life, but you never know what your child’s doing online, especially with Jamie,’ he said.

Elsewhere, a Met Police boss praised Adolescence for shining a spotlight on violence against women, saying the drama has raised awareness of the issue in a ‘significant’ way.

Following the fallout of the series, creators Stephen and Jack Thorne have accepted an invitation from Labour MP Josh McAlister to attend a meeting in Parliament to discuss online safety with MPs.

It comes after Jack advocated for the show to be shown in Parliament and schools, with Sir Keir Starmer indicating that it should during Wednesday’s Prime Minister’s Questions.

The Prime Minister said he watched the programme with his 16-year-old son and 14-year-old daughter, and added that ‘this violence carried out by young men, influenced by what they see online, is a real problem, it’s abhorrent, and we have to tackle it’.

His comments came after Gareth Southgate spoke of the fears he has that young men are spending too much time gaming, gambling and watching pornography, in a speech discussing the importance of better male role models and not just online influencers.

During an interview with BBC Two’s current affairs programme Newsnight, creator Jack said he hopes ‘we can use this moment to provoke this government to consider quite serious change’.

He referenced that the Australian senate has passed a social media ban for young children, saying: ‘I would extend it further, it is about gaming too, and it’s about getting inside all these different systems.’

He admitted there were ‘good’ things about social media and gaming, but stressed the government should legislate to protect teenagers and see ‘what change that could bring to our society’.

Presenter Richard Bacon has questioned if we treat the crisis unfolding in the same way we have with smoking, asking on Question Time this week whether ‘we should treat smartphones like cigarettes and just say they should be illegal until you’re 16’.

In an interview ahead of Adolescence’s launch, Stephen – who shares two teenage children with fellow actress wife Hannah Walters – gave a warning to parents, telling The Independent: ‘It’s just being mindful of the fact that not only we parent our children, and not only the school educates our children.

‘But also there’s influences that we have no idea of that are having profound effects on our young culture, profound effects, positive and extremely negative. So it’s having a look at that and seeing that we’re all accountable.’

‘When we were kids, if you got sent to your room or if Kenny Everett was on the telly, and it got a bit racy, you’d be sent to your room and then you couldn’t watch it,’ he added.

‘But today even within the context of that home, when lads and girls go to their bedrooms, they have the world at their fingertips.’

Adolescence is available to watch on Netflix.

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