AS data from Barnardo’s shows an 18 per cent drop in applications to become foster carers, a former Towie star says it’s never too late to give a child a home.
IT’S the middle of the night and Debbie Bright is feeding a baby, knowing that she’ll have the school run in a few hours.
Most 62-year-old grandmothers would be enjoying a slower pace of life, but the Essex matriarch revels in a house full of kids thanks to her career as a foster carer.
“I’ve seen friends go into a depression because their nest is empty and they feel they lack purpose,” says Debbie, who has taken in more than 200 young people over 30 years and last week alone had six children staying with her.
“But older people have so much to offer and there’s only so many times you can have lunch with your friends.
“My husband Dave is 67 and retired a year ago from his construction job.
“He told me he wouldn’t have adjusted without becoming our full-time family taxi driver. The kids adore him.”
Debbie hit the limelight 14 years ago as Lydia Bright’s glam mum in ITV’s The Only Way Is Essex.
Off camera her life was — and is — a less starry mix of nappy changes, medical appointments and packed lunches.
Had she realised the effort and emotional turmoil involved in fostering when she first volunteered in her twenties, she admits she might never have started.
Debbie, who has four birth children — Georgia, 34, Lydia, 33, Freddie, 26, and Roma, 21, says: “By fluke, I met a lady in a restaurant who fostered and I told her, ‘I’ll do that’.
“I’m one of those people who jumps in feet first.
“When I told Dave, he said we already had our hands full, but I didn’t listen.”
Today, kids’ charity Barnardo’s says there is a foster-care crisis, with 18 per cent fewer households offering to open up their homes than in 2018-19.
“I understand it,” says Debbie. “First of all, you need to have a spare room.
“But very few people have one as the cost of housing is astronomical.
“The assessments are intrusive, too, which is not a bad thing, but not everyone can face going through that.
“I was only able to continue financially as my kids got older because the state introduced allowances for things like clothing and travel.
“But lots of foster families need both parents to work to cover the bills.”
Debbie — called Mum by some of her charges, including Tommy, who came to her aged two and is now grown up — thinks parents worry about the “right” time to introduce foster kids into their existing family.
“My kids would wake up to new faces at the breakfast table some days, but they didn’t know any different,” she says.
‘CHAOTIC HOUSE’
“I’ll admit that there were times when they felt very resentful, especially if a child came in who was challenging and took up a lot of my time.
“The house could be chaotic.
“But it taught them so much about acceptance.
“When Lydia was 16, she said something I’ve never forgotten — that for every 100 negative things about fostering, there will be a million pure positive ones.
“Fostering is a community and you need the support of your family and friends, as well as other fostering families, to make it work.
“Lydia lives five minutes away and will do the school run or babysit if I want to have a weekend away.
“I’m not a foster carer — we are a foster family.”
The Brights have stayed in touch with most of the children they have welcomed into their home in Woodford, East London — with two becoming long-term fosters.
Tommy was two when he and older sister Ellie, six, arrived from a home affected by substance abuse.
Now 21 and 25, the pair call Debbie and her husband Mum and Dad.
But to Debbie’s heartbreak, she has never heard from their very first foster baby who they had for a year because the rules at that time did not allow contact after an adoption.
“I could be sat next to her on the bus and never know,” she sighs.
While the couple have hosted kids from two days to 15 years old, now Debbie only takes babies and toddlers, preferring the physical exhaustion to the mental trials teens bring.
“We all have our strengths,” she says. “You give me six babies in a room and I’m at my happiest.”
But she admits fostering comes with huge emotional strain, especially when she has to say goodbye.
“I’ve collected some as newborns from the hospital and had them for a year to 18 months before they are adopted,” Debbie explains.
“My heart shatters into a million pieces every time.
“I close the door and I’m a wreck.
“Luckily the move to open adoption means I’m now able to stay in touch.
“Every one of us is a book and we’re their first chapter, so it’s important.”
Debbie says kids in her care come from a variety of backgrounds, but there are common themes.
She adds: “I’d say 95 per cent of the children we’ve taken have come from homes where there is drug addiction, alcohol abuse, domestic violence or mental health issues.
‘DON’T REGRET IT FOR A SECOND’
“Drugs and alcohol are powerful. Addiction can tear lives apart.
“Most of the time, the parents still have supervised contact and I do my utmost to form a relationship.
“It’s tragic for them and it’s tragic for their babies. I just give them a hug and show them their child is being cherished.
“On the final day at the contact centre when returning children to their parents, I give them a book of photos and their child’s outfits.
“I cry all the way home.”
Debbie urges anyone who might be able to offer a room and their love to a child in crisis to apply to foster — and not to be put off by practical or emotional concerns.
“There have been times when I’m physically and mentally exhausted and fall into bed crying, thinking it is all too much,” she says.
“But when I wake up, it’s a new day and I don’t regret it for a second.
“The beauty of still doing this in later life is seeing my four-year-old granddaughter Loretta playing with all her ‘cousins’ and accepting them as equals.”
‘Right time to foster is now’
BRENDA FARRELL, Barnardo’s director of fostering and adoption, says: “Barnardo’s has been working with foster carers to bring children into their families for over 150 years.
“However, in 2025 we are doing this work against the backdrop of a very real crisis in our society.
“Thousands of children in care are waiting for safe, happy homes and there simply aren’t enough foster carers to accommodate them.
“Without enough foster carers, too many young people are robbed of the love, support, sense of belonging and opportunities in life that we would want for our own children.
“Our latest figures show that some people across the UK believe their lifestyle holds them back from fostering.
“But at Barnardo’s, we consider all people over the age of 21 who also have a spare bedroom big enough for a child.
“The most important thing is your ability to provide a loving and stable home for a child.
“The perfect time to foster a child doesn’t exist. But the right time is now.”
For more information, visit barnardos.org.uk/foster.