Last year, when Google alerted me to my account being over 80% full, I must admit that I thought about paying for more storage.
As, let’s face it, that would’ve been an easier option than going through my three Gmail accounts and deleting old emails.
However, deep down, I knew that my inboxes (although in desperate need of a clean-up…) weren’t the biggest issue.
Rather, it was the unhealthy way that I was parenting my children, Ella, 11, and Leo, seven.
I couldn’t stop taking photos of them.
Since they were born, I’ve fallen victim to living life through a lens. Capturing their every moment on camera right from the beginning, rather than just savouring moments through my eyes, in real time.
When I finally delved into Google Photos, back in September to tackle my ‘happy-snapping’ head on, I was quite shocked at what was waiting for me.
Since my photos and videos were being backed up from my phone instantly, it meant that, alongside all the photos that I was happy to save, the ones that I’d deleted from my phone – some straight away – were still being added to Google.
Every shameless attempt at a selfie, every poorly angled picture of a meal, sitting alongside every item I have ever uploaded onto Vinted; every photo, video, and meme received from family and friends, and seemingly, 95 photos, taken at different times, of one of my children sucking on a broccoli floret as a weaning baby.
There were years worth of photos of my kids that I sadly had no recollection of taking, which meant that I wasn’t properly living in the moment. Truthfully, I had no idea why I’d thought I needed to document that exact part of their childhood.
A picture of one of them in a supermarket trolley, looking thoroughly hacked off – likely sent to my husband to tell him what we were up to at that precise moment, but did it need to be kept forever? Of course not.
And trawling through the years, there were hundreds, if not thousands, of these pointless pictures staring back at me.
I felt a little disconcerted and very overwhelmed. How had I let it get to this?
Then, not to mention the many photos that the kids had asked me to take of them, which is something that had become quite a bad habit. Especially since they’d inspect the picture afterwards, and order me to take another if it didn’t live up to their expectations.
How sad is that? They’re kids.
It occurred to me that, not only was I wasting valuable time having to go through and delete photos, but I was also instilling in my kids that they needed to photograph everything they did.
It just didn’t sit well with me, especially as they grow up and social media inevitably becomes part of their lives – I didn’t want them to feel that they needed to be constantly sharing every detail of their lives.
I didn’t want them falling into the trap of needing ‘likes’ and flattering photos to validate their self-worth.
I also didn’t want their childhood memories to be of a camera always thrust in their face, as I was certain this could end up having a negative impact on their self-esteem.
Would they feel like they couldn’t just be themselves, because I was chirping ‘smile’ at them? Probably, and they would see it as a form of validation – that Mum prefers the way they look when a camera is facing them.
But, most of all, I really wanted to start properly savouring moments with my kids.
Don’t get me wrong, I certainly don’t ‘cherish’ every moment with them – that’s impossible – just like I do think it’s good to capture some moments in time as a reminder of their childhood, like the times we have spent holidaying with friends, or the very few times it has snowed.
But they don’t need thousands of photos to remind them of that.
When I think back to my own childhood, back in the eighties and early nineties, photos weren’t digital and it was just one photo of a moment, rather than several.
Half the fun was collecting the photos from being developed to see how they’d turned out, to see how perfectly imperfect some of the pictures were. They felt much more ‘real’ because of it.
No editing, no filters, and certainly no retakes to make it look better.
Like back then, I wanted to start capturing the moments that really matter.
Celebration days, first and last days of school, family, friends, holidays…
And now, there are things I’ve put in place to, not only reduce my photo storage on Google and on my phone, but to also stop my kids thinking that every part of life needs to be documented.
Although I still use Google to store pictures, I’ve switched the automatic back up to ‘off’. Monthly, I go through my phone and upload anything I think should be a ‘keeper’ and then, every few months, I use an app where I can get 45 free prints each month.
It’s nice to have some of the finer moments displayed around the house and is a better way to boost a child’s self-esteem, as it can help them feel a sense of belonging. Plus, it’s nice to be reminded of special and fun times together – it’s a good dopamine hit.
The kids have stopped expecting a photo quite so often now, and me modelling healthier phone usage is definitely helping Ella use her newly acquired phone in the same way – stopping to think about the point of taking a photo, before doing so, and enjoying being in the moment more.
Leo has taken to adopting a ‘how silly can I be’ attitude, which means that, in most photos I take, he is pulling a funny face or pose. I suspect it’s a lot to do with his age, but I am loving that he unequivocally doesn’t care about how he looks. That’s good self-esteem, right there.
I can now sometimes go a whole month without having taken a picture of the kids. It has been hard not going into ‘auto-pilot’ and whipping the camera out as it is a difficult habit to break, but I feel like we are all better for it – and so is my Google storage.
This article was originally published August 1, 2024
Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing jess.austin@metro.co.uk.
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